Saturday, February 18, 2012

You are with me.

Dear Brian,
You were standing on the deck at the lake, Janet at your side. I chose this picture for your obituary. Yes, I thought, this is how you left us.

You were  enjoying your dog Butters playing with Pia's dog Walrus. You were happy for the dogs, for the space you loved, their playfulness making you happy, your family and the love of your life by your side.

This is the last picture of took of you, July 4th weekend of 2011. A week or so later, you were dead. This is how I will forever remember you.

Below, is the full picture, you and Janet Lee, your fiance, smiling at the dogs.

This is our last meal, at Redfish, you, Janet, Pia and Jason, your Dad and me, celebrating our 45th Anniversary.

Your dog Butters is now living with Johnny Tully, the young neighbor across the street who offered her a home.

This is your backyard after your death. Your friends and neighbors came over, and they tore down, cleaned up, and installed a new garden. Janet designed the garden of your dreams and she made it happen in just a few weeks.

A lot of love and dedication went into this task. Over a hundred people worked here at one time or other, before and after the funeral services.  The Lee family, including Bryan Lee who took a military leave to be here, made sure this garden came together the way Janet wanted it.  A remarkable feat!
Even friends from high school were here. In this photo, on the left, is Jordan, the friend you had in junior high.

You were most loved, son. You are missed.


  1. This blog is all about Brian. Each post will reveal something about him. If you dropped in accidentally, and you don't know me, I am Brian's mother. He died last July at the age of 31, unexpectedly, after receiving a blow to his head.

  2. Rosaria...just came through/by and saw your blog up for Brian. This is wonderful you are able to do this and hold his memories close. Your heart and love shines through her. I know he is extremely grateful and loves you back entirely from where he is. hugs

  3. Oh Rosaria, .... just to say that my heart goes out to you, and that Brian must have been blessed to have a mother such as you. Vx

  4. i look forward to reading your tribute blog of your remarkable soon that has touched so many.
    Blessing to you as you write. thank you for sharing this wonderful son with us all.

  5. How healing a garden becomes symbolically....the continuation of life, maybe. Beauty remembered each and every season. Did you know Bonnie Woodley who lived here in PO?? She was dying of cancer and before she got too sick to tend to it, her little garden was a beautiful work of art. And the word "art" definitely applies here. Her many friends who were also avid gardeners, would take shifts and come over to keep it up for her. She would not only have many visitors, but friends that shared her love for beauty in fragrance, color and blooms.